An overarching theme for many of the most successful people you come across in life is that they tend to have better habits than you. The people who are in shape, tend to have better eating habits and exercise routines. The people who have a cleaner house, tend to have better cleaning and organization habits. The people with healthy relationships, tend to have better communication habits. The people who are closest to financial independence, tend to have the better money spending habits. And so on and so forth.
These habits, whether realized or not, create the backbone of successful people. Many people innately have some of these habits (or at least we presume they do), but for the rest of us, habits need to be first understood and then trained and learned before we can see the results. That’s where this book comes in.
“Success is a product of daily habits – not once-in-a-lifetime transformations…If you want to predict where you’ll end up in life, all you have to do is follow the curve of tiny gains and tiny loses, and see how your daily choices will compound ten or twenty years down the line”
This is probably my favorite quote of the book.
However, before James teaches you how to create these small habits he teaches you why they are so important which is where most of us need to start.
It doesn’t matter how you change a habit, if you first don’t understand why habits are important, how habits work, the human physcology surrounding habits or why most people quit their habits before they even begin.
Human nature is to want results now, this book breaks down this barrier and the thought process surrounding it. What is the saying about the stone cutter? Something about it’s not the final strike that broke the stone, it’s the hundreds before that.
This book helped me to think deeper about my own limiting beliefs so I could better understand/face my own brain which is really the true barrier to any successful habit. James discusses the psychology of habits and helps focus you on self reflection of why you aren’t creating the habits you desire. This helps you to see where you personally have the biggest barriers to overcome in becoming the person you want to be. This is where I truly got the most out of this book.
“I’m the Type of Person Who..”
This is one of the key phrases that Brad from ChooseFI uses quite frequently on his podcast which he got from Atomic Habits. It’s an identity statement for behavior change. One focused on changing your internal viewpoint. As James puts it, if a smoker trying to quit gets offered a cigarette. Do they say no because they are “trying to quit” or because they “aren’t a smoker”? One statement addresses identity where the other does not.
As James discusses, habits and success are directly linked to your identity. “Your identity emerges out of your habits. Every action is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.”
As the book points out, how many people, you included, are “known” for something? It can be simple for example known for the “the best hair”, “the best style”, “the biggest biceps” etc. It becomes part of your identity when you associate these statements with yourself, you begin to create habits to make sure you always maintain this “title”. As James states, the big biceps guy will not be skipping arms day and probably will continue to research different lifting techniques, routines, and diets to maintain them. Identity becomes a part of your self view and you will do anything to maintain that.
The same is true for negative habits. For years I have said I am not a runner. I would die on that hill. And I have maintained this lack of ability to run because this self identity made it so I never developed the routines to become a runner. I’ve limited myself mentally before I have even had the chance to make any changes. I am setting myself up for failure because this viewpoint of myself is engrained within.
Other common examples in the book include “I’m not a morning person”, “I’m always late”, or “I’m bad with names”.
All these self-identity statements whether good or bad, cause you to continue to behave in a certain way to maintain this self-image. However…
“…when your behavior and your identity are fully aligned, you are no longer pursuing behavior change. You are simply acting like the type of person you already believe yourself to be”
That’s deep!
Challenges to Goal Writing
This book also challenged one of my core principles of goal writing which I have been doing for years now. James made me critically think about if my habit of writing goals was really one that I should reconsider.
James makes multiple points about how goals can actually negatively affect success but two of his points really hit home for me. One, was that winners and losers in life all have the same goal. As James puts it, every Olympian’s goal is to win Gold. Just like many people’s goals are to become rich, get the job or lose weight, etc.
“If successful and unsuccessful people share the same goals, then the goal cannot be what differentiates the winners from the losers.”
We need to focus on the system.
Second, and probably more importantly for myself, goal writing restricts happiness. You tell yourself that you will be happy once you reach said goal. You are delaying your happiness. This concept was a trap I fell into when I first learned about financial independence.
I wanted to be FI sooo badly (the goal), that I focused all my energy on getting to this point that I restricted my happiness during the process. I created very good habits in the short term to reach this goal, but because I wasn’t happy because I wasn’t at this goal yet. I eventually reached a breaking point and low point in my own life.
Thankfully, this didn’t derail me financially as it does with many. But it did lead to significant life changes and regular self reflection. During this time, I was goal oriented but not system oriented. Focusing on the system, allows you to be happy during the journey as each step brings its own happiness. Plus with goal focus, once you reach this goal and reach this happiness, then what?
Conclusion
I wish I could even begin to cover everything that I would like to touch upon after reading this book. However, if I did, that wouldn’t give you any reason to read it yourself.
Overall, I think anyone can benefit from Atomic Habits whether you perceive yourself as an already successful person or not. However, it is especially important for anyone who is having a difficult time achieving something in their life whether that’s through addition of something good or subtraction of something bad.
It’s also for the person who has identified the changes they want to make and has continuously tried to make the changes but continues to fall short. This book will help you to set yourself up for success.
This book is one of those books where I found myself spending more time writing notes about the take away points than actually reading. It is full of as much information/research in psychology, human behavior and self reflection as you can handle (which is what I enjoy) while also giving a structured, real plan to create good habits and break the bad ones. James discusses habit tracking/measurement, motivation, common barriers, and everything in between.
It’s a must read, as this book will help you to unlock your full potential using small, atomic habits as the key.
Have you read Atomic Habits yet? If not and you are interested in getting a copy, feel free to follow the link below.
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As always, let me know what you think of the book in the comments below! Or if you have any personal questions feel free to message me directly at fiscaltherapist1@gmail.com
